It was a surgery I had in my 20s when I didn’t know much and was immature.. I had a severe complex about my nose.. After 12 years, I had it removed two days ago.. There was a protruding part inside my nose, and I had left it alone without knowing whether it was inflammation.. For a long time nothing happened, so I just thought it must be scar tissue.. Maybe because my body got weaker, for a few days something like fluid came out, then it stuck like nasal crust. I peeled it off a few times, and after a few days blood started to come out with it.. I went to a local ENT clinic, and they clicked their tongues and said I had to go to a plastic surgery clinic and have it removed.. I was devastated.. For 12 years after the cosmetic surgery, I lived under a lot of stress. The surgery hadn’t even turned out pretty, and it looked artificial, but I didn’t have the courage to have surgery again, and after getting married I had no time, so I think I just lived with it. I grew distant from people I had been close to,, I also suffered from social avoidance and depression...
My children were young, but it was a surgery I had to do, so I visited several ENT clinics. One place in Gangnam had both an ENT clinic and plastic surgery clinic, and since it was where my husband had his snoring surgery, the hospital was big, and I thought it would at least be familiar, so I went there. They said they would need to use costal cartilage and that it would be 11 million won... They said that because my husband had surgery there, they were giving me a discount... They said I had to do it as soon as possible and that they would schedule the surgery date that day.. Tears suddenly poured out... and they seemed to pity me... It was too expensive, I had no time, and I said I would discuss it with my husband and come back tomorrow, then left. When I got home, I called and asked how much just the removal would be, and they said 2 million won. If I had revision surgery later, I would have to add the remaining 9 million won. It seemed like they were already assuming I would have revision surgery. I was so sick and tired of surgery that, whatever shape my nose ended up in, I did not want to put anything back in again. Costal cartilage surgery is a major surgery, so I was even more worried, and they said revision surgery would only be possible about one or two months after removal. The unspoken expressions of the doctor and nurse created an atmosphere that made it feel like something terrible would happen if I didn’t have surgery now...
That same day, I also stopped by the hospital where I first had my cosmetic surgery.. The director who operated on me had already gone somewhere else.. There was not a single record left, and even though I didn’t say anything, the managers seemed to subtly be on guard around me .. It felt like they were wary that I might complain to the director there.. When I showed my condition to the doctor there, he said it seemed like they could just stitch up the inflamed area.. Thinking back now, it was such an absurd suggestion.. The inside was already completely full of inflammation.. And he said it would be 1.5 million won... Of course, I had no intention of doing it there. I was just curious what kind of attitude they would show... I just had the feeling that they would play around with me again,, I had no trust, so I just left.
Two days later, I thought I should still visit a few places and then decide, so I went around in person. When I looked online, one place came up near the top. It said it was famous for revision surgery in Gangnam. I didn’t know whether it was online marketing, but since there was no way to know, I decided to go no matter what... Choosing a hospital was truly difficult.. When I had the consultation, the director who seemed to be the representative doctor had tremendous pride.. It said they would even treat the heart. I liked the wording, and while showing before-and-after surgical photos on the computer, he showed confidence. He was also older, so he seemed to have a lot of experience... So I came out and had a price consultation with the manager, and again they said 11 million won with costal cartilage. When I asked only about the removal price, that alone was 5.8 million won.. They said if I made a reservation that day, they would do the removal for 5 million won. When I still said it was expensive, they said I needed surgery quickly. I liked the doctor’s impression, but I had consultations booked at other places too, so I left there for the time being. And much later, when I had gone home, received a surgery date at another hospital, and was waiting, they called again... They said that if I didn’t like the price, if I attended one of the director’s seminars, they would give me a 20% discount..
.. I felt betrayed by the first hospital, the one where my husband had surgery. They said they were giving me a discount because my husband had surgery there.. but it was just that price anyway.. I felt betrayed, and the way they seemed to pity me when I cried also flashed uncomfortably through my mind.
The place I went to thinking I would just stop by one last place was in Cheongdam-dong. When I entered, it was not very big, and there was just one doctor there.. Still, since that building belonged to that plastic surgery clinic, I wondered if maybe they wouldn’t be so money-focused, and since he was a board-certified plastic surgeon, I didn’t know about function, but I thought maybe he would do the nose properly. But I also wondered, isn’t this place too small?? And since there was no anesthesiology specialist, what should I do? I had those thoughts too.. Up to then, the places I had visited had all been large, hospital-level hospitals.. I thought maybe bigger hospitals would be more trustworthy. But the noses of the people coming there were pretty.. The manager was kind, seemed humane, and when I met the doctor, he was not authoritarian, and I could feel a confidence that was not showy.. And while looking at my nose, he felt sorry for me but said he still thought it would go well, so I felt relieved. He said it would look strange if everything was removed, and suggested putting in dermis from the buttock. He said then the surgery could be done in one day.. Even then, my mind was a mess... An unknowable distrust and a desire to trust were all mixed together... When I had the price consultation with the manager, she quoted 3.5 million won.. This was at least the cheapest place.. I had neither time nor money to spare, and the manager and doctor both seemed to have decent character, the price was something I could afford at my level, and they said surgery could be done all at once, so I paid the deposit that very day and came home.
I had done my best in choosing, but the result is up to God... Since I had recently been realizing what faith means, I just believed unconditionally that it would go well and trusted the doctor.
During the surgery, I think they used something like a mild hallucinogen. I had said I didn’t want sleep anesthesia, because I wanted to do it while talking. Because of this and that, the surgery start time was delayed, so the surgery started at 6:30 in the evening and ended after 11 at night.. Some nurses went home, and only two nurses and the doctor did the surgery. At first I briefly went somewhere strange, and when I came back, I was on the operating table with my nose flipped open, and the doctor was talking as if this was the first case of its kind for him. The adhesions were so severe and the inflammation was so bad that he was struggling.. He even said he might not be able to finish all the surgery in one day, and I heard sounds of him pulling it off, but it wasn’t coming off well. The surgery time became so long that the doctor also became sensitive.. From the beginning, I had a feeling the surgery would be difficult. I thought the Gore-Tex would be severely adhered, because I had a habit of repeatedly pulling my nose outward. I had a complex about my upturned nose when I was young.. But seeing him struggle on the operating table was truly hard for me too, even though I was half-asleep and half-awake... Still, I trusted him. I believed it would go well... Then I heard him say, “Oh~ it’s done,” sounding relieved.. He told me I had worked hard and that everything had now been removed,, and that he would now fill it with dermis and stitch it up...
Later, he said the adhesions were so severe that he thought he might not be able to finish everything in one day.. When he opened it up, the inflammation was also very severe, but the inflammation that seemed like it might not come out was completely removed.. He had said that if the inflammation could not be removed, there would be no choice but to wait much longer and have another surgery before putting in the dermis... I prayed so much, and maybe it had an effect.. haha The doctor said my nose shape turned out better than expected, and that from the beginning I had almost no nasal bridge, so he had not raised the bridge much. He also seemed to say that more dermis was needed than expected and that it seemed a little insufficient.. He did not say it clearly, but that is how I heard it.. The shape of my nose is important too, but now the hard nose that tormented me, and the nose that bled because inflammation developed, are gone, and I feel so relieved,,, It doesn’t have to be glamorous; from the beginning I was only hoping for a natural-looking nose that did not look strange. I really did not have much greed from the start. It has only been two days now, so it is swollen, bruised, and a mess, but the nose shape does not look strange, and I actually think it has become a pretty nose~ (I told you I wasn’t very greedy, right?? Earlier haha) I will upload completed photos again in about a month..^^
I am grateful to the director who canceled his appointment and operated on me until after 11 at night... And I am also very thankful to my husband, who was anxiously waiting from 8:30 while watching the children, wondering why I wasn’t coming out. Now I will love my nose a lot.. I saw somewhere in this community that you first have to learn how to love yourself, and it feels like those words were meant exactly for me..
And the objects removed from my nose were silicone and Medpor septal cartilage, even though for 12 years I had believed it was Gore-Tex. I knew about the rest, but the fact that it was silicone and not Gore-Tex is just.. how should I put it,,, Since it would have been harder to remove if it had been Gore-Tex, should I be grateful?? I found out Medpor was inside because inflammation developed and the inside became visible!!
For those having nose cosmetic surgery for the first time, please don’t do it.. And for those who did it and are having revision surgery, please be careful when choosing a hospital. Wouldn’t it be better not to have sleep anesthesia? Like me, instead of Gore-Tex, silicone and Medpor, which I had never even heard of, may have been put inside...
Liked 4