It is the 4th day after I had early removal 11 days after nasal cartilage tying. Every single day is truly so painful. I had so many things planned for vacation and so many things I wanted to do, but I never dreamed it would turn out like this. I can’t face my mom and dad, so I’m just shut in my studio apartment, and even just looking at photos of my dog who must be at my family home, or photos of my mom and dad, makes me cry. I really don’t want to live. When I looked up reviews of nasal cartilage tying, I saw posts saying it didn’t change anything, they only wasted money, there was no effect, and that’s why I decided to do it. If I had known it would change like this, really... My nostrils used to not show at all from the front, but now my nostrils show, and even if I lift my chin just a little, my nostrils show so much that I look too much like a pig. If not a pig, then a bat.. I only wanted my nose to become just slightly, really only slightly smaller so only I would notice, but was I punished for being too greedy? I’m only 22, and when I think about living the rest of my life, I feel so suffocated. I honestly would rather die. I don’t even have the courage to die, so every day I just look at this community, read reviews from people who returned to their natural noses, and live glued to my phone. When I hear people tell me it has only been 4 days since removal, so because of swelling and everything I may not know yet, I wonder if I’m being too impatient, and sometimes I get hope that it might come back. But when I look in the mirror again, I see myself with a pig nose, and it feels like it will never change for the rest of my life... No one knows I had surgery, so I have no one to talk to, and I live like this every day. I wanted to go to graduate school looking a little prettier, but now that this has happened, I don’t know if I’ll even be able to study properly. I’m so scared to tell my mom and dad.. I just want to go back to my old nose, pretend nothing happened, and see my mom and dad. Not being able to see my family is the hardest part. I feel like I’m living in a nightmare every day. Please, even if it is a simple surgery, never do anything to your nose...
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