First rhinoplasty revision + revision surgery review••

<Congenital nose><2 years after the first surgery (day of revision surgery)><6 months after revision (day of AS surgery)>3 years ago, I had the first surgery with silicone (4 mm) + septal cartilage + a little mesh at the tip of the nose. The silicone bent a little and the shape of my nose gradually started to look like it did before surgery, so I decided on a revision and after looking around, I had it done exactly 1 year ago. Thinking back now, I really just chose the hospital without much thought and only trusted the director,, the director’s preferred nose aesthetic also didn’t suit me,, I only went by the line, so I feel like I should have explained that properly ㅠㅠ Anyway, for the revision I had autologous costal cartilage + silicone (6 mm), and there was no separate discussion about the height or anything like that. They said they would make it pretty on their own, so I just trusted them and went ahead, and that was my mistake. I should have explained the image I wanted and the kind of feel that would suit my face, but somehow it feels like it was all my fault, just honestly. Right after coming out of surgery, it already looked way too high, so I asked how much silicone was used, and they said 6 mm. I had liked the bridge height from before and only wanted to fix the tip and the line, so I thought I might have messed up a bit, but I wondered if 2 mm could really make such a big difference? The manager said 6 mm wasn’t even considered high at their hospital ㅠ She said lots of people get it higher than that,, so I waited, and even when the padding came off, I could see that one side was shifted to one side. I kept being stressed about swelling and all that, and the height was honestly, I felt like I was some kind of Lee Byung-hun,,ㅠ It didn’t suit me at all, and the height was way too much. Also, I have a snub nose, so they would have lowered it downward by that much,, but my nose and the skin on the side? couldn’t withstand it. It itched so, so much, and it felt like there was no flesh on the nose?? Even if I scratched it, it felt like scratching a mosquito bite on a toe ㅠ Still, they said it was because of swelling and scar tissue, so I got injections every month. The surgeon always said it hadn’t bent at all, and that because autologous costal cartilage was used, whenever the height is raised, one side naturally gets thicker, so it can only look bent. What the hell, does that make any sense? And they said this height wasn’t even among the high ones in their hospital patients. Sigh. The nostrils, with the support columns placed there, got stuck to the columellar wall and the alar tissue, so breathing was hard and I kept having to breathe with a huffing sound, forever until the AS surgeryㅡㅡ They said it was swelling, damn it. Anyway, I was told I had to endure it for 6 months, so I quit my job and just stayed home, and once I had exactly reached 6 months, I had the AS surgery. Because I was so anxious about the height, I asked them to set it lower than the 4 mm I had in the first surgery with custom silicone, and to lower the tip to match it. Since I couldn’t breathe well on the side where the support column was placed, I asked them to make that support a bit thinner. And also to correct the bend•• I really thought everything would be fine after AS. They said it would get better. But when I looked at the CT before the AS, was that really a human nose?ㅠ Isn’t there basically no skin on the bridge? ㅡㅡ Ugh, is that sane or insane. It’s been exactly 6 months since I had AS, so I’m looking into hospitals now ㅎ I’ve already booked consultations starting next week, and I’m planning a second revision within May haha The height of course has gone down, but the bend is getting even more bent ㅠ I think it’s because the nose skin can’t handle the tension + If you look at my nose CT, it was already bent to one side from the start, so if you place a support on that side, wouldn’t it naturally tip even more to the opposite side? Damn^^ Breathing is a little better than before, but the part that’s stuck is still the same ㅠ The only difference is whether it’s perfectly stuck tight or just a little loosely stuck lol And maybe my nose is still too high, because the bridge itches and the skin thinning hasn’t gone back at all ㅠ Starting next week, I’m going around for revision consultations, and I want surgery using the current silicone and reused autologous costal cartilage. Would that be possible, damn it ㅠ Would reusing silicone be a bit much...? It’s only a 6-month-old brand-new one•• Even if it gets lower and lower, I just want the line to be pretty ㅠㅠ sob I suddenly got so angry that I’m just rambling,, I had the revision because of marriage, but it failed, so I pushed the wedding back by 2 years too. Damn, I’m really depressed. Everyone, don’t just vaguely trust them either. Please clearly say exactly what you want. What the director wants and what I want could be as different as heaven and earth^^ Please,,!! It’s my money and I’m the one getting the surgery, and of course^^ the director is the one performing it, so if the director fully understands the direction I want and performs the surgery accordingly, failures should go down,, Everyone, don’t be scared and say what you want confidently (I need to do better at this myself tooㅠ Please leave recommendation comments for revision hospitals~!!