3 weeks since my 4th surgery

I browsed and gathered information every day on this community, and on May 22 I had my 4th nose surgery (I had my double eyelids done for the first time too) To briefly summarize my surgeries so far: 1. First surgery. In 2004, at a plastic surgery clinic in Apgujeong, surgery with Gore-Tex + ear cartilage 2. Second surgery After surgery, the nasal bridge looked crooked to one side and the hump that had been shaved down looked raised. In January 2005, at the same clinic, Gore-Tex was removed and silicone inserted 3. Third surgery Three years later, the area between the eyebrows suddenly became very swollen, clear fluid kept coming out from inside the nostrils, and crusts formed inside the nose So I had the silicone removed at the same clinic again. 4. Fourth surgery The nose looked crooked, and around the area where the hump had been shaved down, something like a bruise or scar tissue seemed to show through on the bridge and protrude. It was so stressful that I kept getting the injections the hospital gave me and tried taking medicine too, but nothing worked. I made up my mind and had revision surgery at a different hospital Since I have a wide nose, I had osteotomy, the thinnest silicone possible (they said the surface might not be smooth), ear cartilage, columella lengthening, and alar reduction, making it a rather long 4-hour surgery. Oh, and I also had a deviated septum, so an ENT doctor operated too. So two doctors worked on my nose~ It was my first open rhinoplasty. I was very worried open surgery would leave a scar, but you can’t even tell. I’m satisfied with my nose right now. I like the side profile, and for the front view, I’m just satisfied with it as it is. Maybe because of the osteotomy, it also feels more reduced, and I really hope there won’t be any inflammation or other problems going forward. I went through so much emotional stress during all this that I never want to go through this kind of surgery or experience again. On the first night after my last surgery, I was in so much pain everywhere that I only thought I wanted to jump off and die like this~ I’m a smoker, but this time I’m definitely sticking to quitting. My nose sometimes throbs or feels a sharp twinge, so I’ll avoid smoking and drinking until it completely goes away... They also told me not to pick my nose for a month, so I hold out as long as I can, and when it feels too full to bear any longer, I go to the hospital and have my nose cleaned outㅜ.ㅠ Looking back now, the thing I regret most is doing the revision at the same hospital as the first surgery just to save money. There are many people here who had revision surgery and many who had their first surgery too, but I’m posting this in the hope that no one goes through the same emotional distress I did, and that everyone’s surgeries turn out safely and well.