I've had rhinoplasty 4 times so far.. It's not necessarily that something is really wrong, or that this is clearly, objectively wrong.. It's been 1 month since my revision surgery, but my nose looked crooked.. the bend came back again They call it contracture.. My nose gets bigger and smaller. Really, like before surgery......... But truly, all of this situation I've suffered emotionally for a little over 2 years.. I've realized the fact that all of this situation will only end if I die..... That makes me so sad Before, I lived with the vague thought that if I tried somehow, anything could be achieved if I tried hard enough.. If someone simply had more expertise in that field than I did, I trusted and followed that person, and if they said it was right, I thought, I guess it's right But now, even though I'm not an expert, more than expertise in that field, personal taste or the very purpose itself has turned subjective.. I don't want anything else, I just want to go back to how I was before surgery, but I don't know if that's realistically impossible No matter how hard I try, it doesn't work It really feels like it will only end if I die.. I thought that if I was lacking and tried, if I tried a little harder, all of this situation would end here, but it wasn't like that. I truly have no idea how I'm supposed to live my life from now on This is really sad, but. Well well, well Thinking that everything can be achieved through effort was a big mistake.
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