When I was having mine done, it seemed like there was another person on the operating table at the same time, because the doctor repeatedly left the room, and it felt like they couldn’t focus. The nurses were also talking among themselves about whether hemostasis was going well or not. The result, of course, is uneven eyes, and even though I didn’t have epicanthoplasty, the shape of the inner corners changed into hooked eyes that look like a failed epicanthoplasty. I can’t even look at other people’s eyes, and I want to avoid meeting acquaintances. I’m working hard to find a hospital for revision surgery. If it were just that I felt it was ruined, I might somehow deal with it as a matter of personal satisfaction, but my eyes are simply damaged, so other hospitals keep refusing revision surgery. There was no way my parents couldn’t read the constant extreme and negative thoughts I had after the surgery, and when I honestly opened up about them, I felt that only my parents would remain by my side even through hardship. That is the only valuable thing I gained after the surgery. So I think even more that I must not collapse.
If only I hadn’t watched YouTube that day