After having three children and getting older, I had nose surgery. My eyes kept drooping, so I went for a hospital consultation, and they said it was nothing major. Without much information, I impulsively booked it and just went through with it. I was never some outstanding beauty, but I was slim and had good style, so I covered things well and lived fine for a long time. But I aged without reflection and had surgery without much thought. Now I have fierce-looking, fully incised eyes with epicanthoplasty, and a huge nose. I was so shocked, and my children were shocked too. I spent three months that felt like hell. I panicked. Collapsed. Got psychiatric counseling. Became underweight. I had been through many things and lived a life of overcoming them. But having your face change is a completely different story.
But. I decided to just live with it. Well. It’s not like I was ever pretty anyway. I had to relearn how to do my makeup too. Because my face changed. I had to change the way I dress too. Because my overall impression became fierce. Still, I accepted it and lived on, but then suddenly I had severe pain in my nose and suffered a lot. The hospital said it wasn’t an inflammatory reaction. But I was in pain. And the panic came back. While looking into things here and there and studying, I decided to change my constitution completely into a healthy one. I also have severe dermatographism. Things like that. Spicy food. Alcohol. Hot foods and drinks. The habit of staying up at night. Instant foods. Coffee. I quit them all. I’m living such a restrained life that someone might think I’m fighting cancer, and I’m changing my constitution. Of course, I did take antibiotics. Now I’m going to a Korean medicine hospital.
The reason I’m writing this is because I’ve seen so many posts from people who had cosmetic surgery and then kept repeating surgeries for psychological reasons. I also can’t look in the mirror. I know too well how painful it is. I still live with an anxiety disorder. I had lived a strong life without knowing anything like that, but I got it after coming down from the operating table and seeing my changed nose.
Still. Still. I think revision surgery is the last remaining card in life, so let’s postpone it as long as we can. Really, let’s postpone it until we can’t postpone it anymore. Even my huge nose is gradually getting smaller after a year. The problem is that it hurts. haha
The more urgent it feels, let’s take the long way around. Don’t be afraid. Everyone is beautiful.