Day 32 after surgery... I’m going to let go of it now~

Despite my family and boyfriend trying to stop me, it has been about 32 days since I had nose surgery and medial epicanthoplasty, and I’m still upset because there is still a lot of swelling. Of course, everyone’s constitution is different, so the speed at which swelling goes down must be different too. I know that, but I keep worrying, I can’t focus well on other things, and I keep looking in the mirror. When I go outside, I also find myself looking at people’s noses a lot. Today was the first time I met my boyfriend after surgery. I deliberately didn’t meet him for a month... because I didn’t want him to see me looking very swollen. Since I met him while a lot of the swelling still hadn’t gone down, I repeatedly warned him before meeting that I was swollen and would look very awkward, but when we actually met, he found it very awkward and didn’t like it. He said my cute impression from before surgery had completely disappeared, and he seemed really disappointed......;;;;;; The look in his eyes when he seriously asked whether I thought it was good that I had the surgery.... really made me even more upset. I wish my swelling would go down a lot, a lot~ quickly, quickly, like other people’s. The clinic also told me that my swelling is going down a little slowly. They said there are people whose swelling goes down even more severely slowly than mine, so I shouldn’t worry too much... >.< I’m so, so jealous of people who become very natural within a month. You must be so lucky~~~~ To make the swelling go down quickly, I’ve been applying warm compresses often, sleeping sitting up, never taking naps, even deliberately bought an exercise bike to ride at home every day, followed along to the market or mart every day, and ate a lot of pumpkin juice and pumpkin porridge, but in the end it’s going down slowly... Sigh;;;; Now I really need to let go of it, watch TV while smiling, and just diligently ride the exercise bike. I should start doing the studying I couldn’t do for a month... Since all my attention was focused on my nose, I couldn’t get myself to do anything else. Anyway... I hope the swelling goes down quickly, and I hope I really feel that getting the surgery was the right choice. Please~