Rambling at two weeks after complete removal

Hi.. I deliberately tried to stay away from this community for a few days because I was worried it might worsen my mental state and didn't think writing would help much. But after seeing everyone's posts after surgery, I remembered how desperately I had wanted information, so I'm writing in case anything here helps. The more removal posts, the better….. (The splint and stitches have been completely removed.) After taking off the splint, I was extremely depressed because I looked like a human-faced fish and just collapsed. But my doctor said I looked different to them and comforted me by saying they had thought I was already in my second week when I was only one week post-op (was that really true..). Maybe because I applied swelling cream, the yellow bruising has faded quickly, and when I look in the mirror, the swelling has gone down dramatically in just a week, so now I look like a semi-human-faced fish. But I think this is probably how I look after everything has been removed, so I'm trying to get used to it. One reason my nose still feels fish-like even as the swelling goes down is that, thinking about it, my eyes have changed too? Even before, having a slightly narrow space between my eyes was kind of a complex, so I measured it and found it had widened by 1 cm. I rubbed my eyes and measured it several times because I genuinely couldn't believe it. Even while writing this, I still can't believe it. Should I say the overall impression of my eyes has subtly changed? When you look closely, they seem the same, but they are definitely different (I just measured with a ruler. Maybe the raised center has disappeared, making it measure longer; I don't know). I assume the skin that had been pulled when my nose was raised naturally relaxed, and the inner-corner incisions I had made have become rounder, almost like a natural reversal;; I seriously wondered for a moment whether I should have the canthoplasty redone. In the first week, I liked that the tip was lifted, rounded, and prominent, but as the swelling went down, it dropped, and as the bridge gradually filled out, it seemed to be getting close to a semi-straight nose. By my standards, the scars are severe. From the side, the incision lines are clearly visible, and from below, they look like a complete mess, probably because there were multiple incisions. I'm clinging on stubbornly so I don't develop severe mental distress over this. Actually, never mind, that's a lie.. Dozens of times a day I'm like, 'The scars are so bad,' then, 'No, they'll get better if I wait,' obsessing over it like Jekyll and Hyde. I'm planning to go to a dermatology clinic after a year and get laser treatment or something, but when I checked the price, it was around 200,000 won per 1 cm per session, which completely killed my enthusiasm. Sad. Maybe because I had an osteotomy and smoothing for a hump, when I touch the bridge, there are places that feel indented and uneven. When I touched the tip after removing the splint, it felt almost like a water balloon? The skin and texture were the softest there (I was insanely excited at that moment. I felt like I was flying into space. After living with a hard nose, it felt completely different. I was so excited that I kept touching it, while desperately holding myself back from pressing deeply. It felt like having my own natural squishy toy.) Now it is definitely less soft than then, but I am still happy knowing there is nothing inside my nose. Other people say the side profile has not changed much, but the front looks very different. My whole face looks completely different, and so does the overall impression. Oh, and everyone in their reviews said their nose felt clear and light immediately after surgery because the foreign material was gone, but I didn't feel that. However, the unexplained nasal itching I had, the occasional pimples on the bridge, the redness, and the headaches have disappeared. The tingling sensation around the implant when I turned over in bed has also decreased by about half. There is still an occasional tingling feeling, perhaps because the inside is healing. For now, I'm simply grateful and satisfied with the result my doctor gave me—a human nose without any particular issues (so far!!! I know I need to watch it longer). I'll post another update at one month.