It’s Because of the Timing for Removal.. Please Look at My Photos..

It’s now been 2 months since surgery.. About 2 weeks ago, when I was going crazy with depression, I had made a consultation appointment at a hospital near my home to have it removed.. but after a phone call with Maybe and reading a specialist’s consultation reply, I pulled myself together and decided to wait 6 months. You can tell from the photos.. but recently I took an ID photo and was shocked again.. the high glabella.. that has gotten a little better over time. But you can clearly tell the silicone starts from too high up, so it looks so unnatural.. just a few millimeters make a big difference.. And unlike in the photo, in real life the area between my eyebrows stands up thinly in an “11” shape.. My nasal tip has gotten thicker, my alar area looks pinched, both sides of my nose are completely different (it was originally asymmetric).. my nostrils.. the asymmetry is so clearly visible.. from the front.. like one side is pulled over.. Today my parents said I looked prettier before I had it done and that I look too unnatural now, and everything I had been doing to hold myself together fell apart again.. I’m going crazy wanting to remove it, but the director.... clearly said before surgery that he would slightly shave down the hump...... but when I asked again.. he said he shaved a lot.. seeing as we had planned to put in 1 mm but he put in 2 mm.. Anyway, he says if I remove it, it will be flat and broad.. I’m scared the bridge of my nose will look completely awkward if the silicone is removed.. and I don’t know whether the hard and large nasal tip is scar tissue or whether a lot of cartilage was inserted.. Other people say it was hard and big but becomes slimmer at night, but mine just stays like this... I don’t know whether it’s because of scar tissue or because they put a lot of something in. There is also a round cartilage mark at the nasal tip.. Is it right to keep waiting 6 months.. I’m worried the tied alar cartilages will adhere... and if what is filling my nasal tip right now is scar tissue, I’m scared that touching it could make things worse.. What should I do, really.. If I remove even the support strut (it was done with ear cartilage), I’m afraid it could cause even greater damage.. My nose before surgery... the hump... unless I turned completely to the side like in a dictionary illustration, it didn’t show much.. I tried to remove the bump and ended up like this.... I really want to die.. I’m having such a hard time because of the timing for removal.. in the end, removal is my choice, but... people who have had removal, please give me advice.. I think I wrote this all over the place because I’m not in my right mind.. If it’s released after 6 months, especially the tied alar cartilages.. will they go back to how they were?